Awhile ago I posted about how I was going to try the
positive discipline by filling a glass jar with decorative rocks whenever I caught "A" being good. A little over a month later he has filled the jar. I am so proud. The experience has been really great in our household. It is challenging me to find positive moments with my child and it is a great incentive for him. It hasn't been perfect. "A" still constantly points out what he did and then ask for a gem for it (a no-no). Some days he may only earn one gem and then on other days he may earn eight. Just this week we discussed a 0-3 gem day wasn't a great day, 3-6 gems was an okay day, 6-8 gems was a great day.
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Isn't it pretty! |
I had originally not wanted to take any gems away for negative behavior, but sadly that didn't happen. I would still like that to be the goal. However, sometimes I am left with no other option. We have been discussing the levels of punishment a lot this week too. My first choice for punishment will always be time-outs and taking things away (a fun outing, TV time, a toy, etc). True Story: Once I even boxed up every toy in his room in different boxes and bins. He had to be good for two whole days and then he could get a bin back. He couldn't decide what toys went in the bin so he had to look at the bin and choose wisely. When it comes to time-out there has to be a level of obeying though (if you really think about it). The child has to go to time-out and stay there. When you have a truly defiant child that won't always happen. I have literally spent all day taking "A" to time-out and then he comes out and I pick him up and take him back! Some weeks he will do time-outs and I think he has gotten over the fighting me on the whole thing but then NOPE back to same old thing. So what we have discussed is time-outs will always happen first, if he is defiant and comes out of time-out early a gem is taken away. The point is that no gems would be taken away if he just went to time-out.
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"A" putting gems in his jar |
Surprisingly, even with some bad days and gems being removed he filled it in one month. When he reached half way he chose ($5 limit) to go to Menchies-our favorite frozen yogurt place. He was so excited at the half way point he told everyone-even his toys. He also drew a very adorable picture of himself putting gems in the jar. At the full point he got to go to KidsClub ($10 limit). A really fun child play place in my town. It couldn't have happened any better of a time since school starts soon. So now we are starting over. Hopefully, this month goes as well on the system.
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"A's" Reward- Kid's Club Fun & Fitness |
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